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Movies, Shopping, the Zoo
We had a ‘family day’ today. It was pretty terrible. I didn’t fall asleep until around 5am last night. And my dad woke me up at noon telling me that we were going into the city to spend the day together. I had to take a five minute shower and didn’t even have time to… Read more
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Trying,
I’m trying really hard to be happy. I’m trying really hard to not fall back into my rut of watching television constantly and binging. I’m trying really hard to get shit done, like scholarship, college, and job applications. But I’m stuck in the middle. I am constantly trying to resist my urge to just lay… Read more
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My future self
I just..I have this vision of my future self in my head. I don’t want to be this ugly girl who hates everyone and does nothing but watch TV and obsess about her weight (lost three pounds last week, by the way). The vision I have is this girl who is pretty, in an unconventional… Read more
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Nightmares
I have nightmares all the time. The real reason that I got rid of my normal bed and got a futon is because it’s closer to the ground. So when I roll around in my sleep and fall off it doesn’t hurt. My therapist (my old one, I don’t go anymore) said it’s because I… Read more
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Cutting, Pinatas, Atheism
I apologize for yesterday’s horribly depressing entry. My darkness was really overpowering all weekend. Today was better. The morning started off awful. I went to class, and didn’t have my rough draft finished. We did peer editing and I just felt really stupid showing people my four paragraphs. I thought about death the whole way… Read more
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