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A diary, I guess

  • Relationships

    I’m not talking about romantic relationships specifically, just any type of relationship with another person. I don’t have any solid relationships. Not even Allen knows about my eating disorder or my cutting (he does know I take antidepressants though). I don’t have anyone I can just talk to about anything. I sometimes lay in bed and… Read more

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  • The other Melanie.

    I have this one friend, Melanie. She, like Steve, is one of those people that everyone loves. She just has one of those personalities. We’ve always gotten along well, I think that’s weird because she has lots of friends and likes everyone while I have like four friends and dislike everybody. It’s probably because we… Read more

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  • Best friends, Bonfire, Binging

    Tonight I went to my friend’s bonfire. She turned 18 today but it wasn’t really a birthday party.  Allen wasn’t there. He did talk to me today though. After ignoring my texts for a long time he logged into Skype and I messaged him. All he said back was “hi” and then he proceeded to ignore me. I guess… Read more

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  • Hoarding, Coffee, Allen

    I was going to post about this yesterday, but I basically forgot. Yesterday at school, I was actually happy for a while. I had a casual conversation with a girl I don’t know in math class (that’s really hard for me, usually), and when I got to French like three seconds after this one kid… Read more

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  • Suicide

    Oh, I just thought that I should mention, so it won’t seem strange when I blog about it later, that I’m suicidal. I think about killing myself all the time. Almost every night. I think the only thing stopping me is my family/friends. I know it would mess them up pretty bad. Read more

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